The Art of Pickup

My friend Frank and I were sitting in front of the TV watching a football game and chatting. I guess I mentioned that I had not succeeded in hooking up with a woman for several weeks and I was not about to pay a prostitute but that I was getting really horny. I've never had good luck keeping a long term girlfriend.

He said, "If you just want an easy fuck or blowjob, I've got a plan that works for me almost every time but you can't be picky. I go bar hopping but I don't start till about eleven or so. Sometimes I have to go to three or four bars before I spot the right girl but I know her when I see her. She's usually but not always a little older than me. She is either homely but not ugly, or over weight and she is dressed like you would expect a beautiful young temptress to be. You know, either a short skirt or short shorts that let half of her ass stick out the bottom and a tube top or halter top or something like that."

I looked at him, "I want the beautiful young temptress." I'm just your average white guy. I'm 31, 5'10" and weigh 185. I'm getting my first few grey hairs, I wear glasses and have just a little bit of a middle aged tummy. Frank is a lot like me. I do have a pretty nice seven inch cock but you have to get that far before a woman would know that. "Sure you do but how often do you get one?" Frank replied. I just slowly nodded my head. Frank continued, "I walk up to her and whisper in her ear, How about going out to my car and giving me a blowjob? Once in a while I get slapped but dressed like she is, she is probably out looking for sex too. I pick the less desirable ones because not a lot of other guys have hit on her, she is not expecting a guy better than me and if I do get to fuck her she is probably going to be nice and tight because she has not had a lot of cocks pounding her pussy. Doug, you'd be surprised how many times I score a piece of ass or get the cum sucked out of my cock."

It sure sounded reasonable, especially since I had already downed three beers in the last half hour. The game ended about ten and I decided to try it. I was sitting there during the fourth quarter with a hard-on from thinking about what Frank said but with him there, I couldn't do anything about it. Frank went home to his wife and I headed to the parking lot and got in my car.

It was the third bar I went to before I spotted a girl like what Frank said to look for but there she was sitting at the bar. She wasn't older than me. She actually looked five or ten years younger but she fit everything else he said to look for. She was wearing cutoff jeans shorts and a bright yellow halter top. She was probably thirty pounds or more overweight, had pretty thick glasses, had on more makeup than looked right but had not done her dull brown hair up in any fancy way. She had more of a beer belly than I did.

I was nervous about how Frank had said to approach her but there was an empty stool next to her and I figured that worse thing that could happen would be that I would get slapped in front of everyone else in the bar. I sat next to her. I leaned close and spoke softly, "How would you like to go out to my car and give me a blowjob?" At first there was a shocked look on her face as she turned to look at me but then it went away and she scanned me from head to toe, stopping for a good look at my crotch. "Buy me a drink and we'll talk about it." I called the bartender. She had a Bloody Mary and I had a Bud. We introduced ourselves by our first names only and made small talk till our drinks were about gone. Then I again asked her if she would go out to my car with me. She looked me in the eye for a minute and just said, "Sure."

We got in my car. Joan reached back and unhooked and removed her halter top. "Suck my tits first." Her tits were probably 38 or 40 D's and sagged quite a bit but they were still nice and she had big hard nipples. I really enjoy nursing on a woman's boobs. When my lips first wrapped around one of her nipples, she let out a loud moan and pushed her chest at my face. I probably spent five minutes sucking and squeezing her breasts and actually brought her to an orgasm doing it. While I was doing it, she had her hand in my pants and around my shaft, slowing jacking me.

She backed away, "OK, it's my turn now." I shifted my position, lifted my butt and pulled my pants and shorts down to my knees. In the moonlight she saw my prick for the first time. "That's a really nice cock. I'm going to enjoy this." With that, she wrapped her hand around the base of my cock and slipped her lips over the head. My cock jumped and I groaned. It had been a while. I hoped I did not come too quickly.

She licked and sucked on my cockhead while she slid her hand up and down my shaft. I sat there with my eyes closed, enjoying the feeling. After a minute she stopped. I opened my eyes and looked down. She looked up at me and smiled, "Am I doing it the way you like it?" "You're doing great but it would be even better if you took your hand away and used your mouth more." Joan moved her hand and took more of me in her mouth. I started moving my hips, fucking in time with her bobbing head. A couple times I touched the back of her mouth and she gagged a little.

I put my hand on the back of her head and controlled the speed that I wanted her to suck me at. After several minutes I felt my balls filling with cum and start to tighten. I put my hands on both sides of her head and held her still as I fucked into her mouth as hard and fast as I could without gagging her. Joan locked her lips around my shaft and sucked as hard as she could. My spunk raced down my fuck tool and exploded in her mouth. I could feel her swallowing as my prick pulsed several times, each time shooting a stream of my seed into her mouth.

I stopped coming but she did not stop sucking till I went limp. Joan sat up. There was a small string of cum at the corner of her mouth. She wiped it into her mouth with her finger and sucked her finger. She smiled at me, "That was really good." I told her that if she waited just a few minutes I could get hard again and I would give her pussy a good fucking. "That sounds nice but I'm having my period so it's out of the question." Joan re-fastened her top and opened the car door at stepped out. She blew me a kiss and headed back to the bar while I sat in the car with my meat in my hand.




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