Exploring the Ultimate Luxury Spacecraft: A Journey to Mars and Beyond

My Sexy New Spaceship

It had taken me years, but I finally had my own space pod. I bought it free and clear, complete with an android crew, and I never had to go back to Earth again if I didn't want to. It was brand new and unused. The gravitational systems, navigation, communications, light engines, and even a few things I had yet to check out were all tested and guaranteed to work or I get my credits back. At less than 2 million credits, this mansion of a starship was a steal. It was looking like 3257 was really going to be my year.
"It's good doing business with you, Mr. Jackson. Enjoy your ship. Take as much time as you need to get her out of the shipyard."
As I walked across the landing that connected my cargo hold to this salesman's office, I was nearly brought to tears. It was finally mine. All that work wasn't for nothing. I could retire in peace and comfort.
It was strange seeing how many ships were not just larger than mine, but could easily dwarf my little mansion without noticing. The bridge was surrounded by a glass cylinder that protected me from the vacuum of space as I walked the length of two football fields to reach my new baby.
"Finally, you're all mine my darling. And what shall I call you?" I said to myself as I stepped off the landing and into my very shiny and clean but very empty cargo hold. My words echoed off walls so distant I could barely see what color they were from where I stood. The light above my head didn't extend that far.
"Actually, she's known as the Buena Vista if you ask the ship company." I turned so quickly I almost hurt my neck. Right there before me was a man of about 5'8" and maybe 160 lbs. wearing a butler's uniform. On my new ship.
"What? Who are you? How did you get on my ship?"
"Oh, my deepest apologies, Master. I am the Alfred b761 model butler droid. Like the ship, I can very easily be renamed according to your specifications."
"Y-you're an... android? You do NOT look like an android."
"Well, thank you, sir. Neither does the rest of the crew. Only state of the art equipment aboard the Buena Vista... or whatever you choose to call her. Shall I escort you to the turbocar sir? I presume you're anxious to see your new bridge."
"I am anxious to see the bridge, but what's a turbocar?"
"Please Master, allow me to show you."
I followed him in a straight line toward a yellow encasement built into the wall. As we got closer I could see it was a pair of sliding doors. Alfred pressed a button on the side of the doors to reveal what looked to me like a roller coaster car, except that it was enclosed in a railway system. The bucket seats were in two rows of three with large, uncomfortable looking harnesses. "If you please, sir," he said, waving me in.
"Okay, but uh... What is it?"
"Why it's the turbocar, sir. It's sort of like an elevator except it has seats, it's faster, and it does a lot more than just go up and down. I've set it to take you directly to the bridge."
I got in and sat down. "How do I work the seatbelt?"
"Oh, don't worry about that, sir. Just keep your arms and legs inside the car at all times. The turbocar will do the rest." With that he pressed the button on the side of the doors, and they slid closed.
A computer voice said, "Please stay in your seat while the safety harness is lowering into position." I looked up and saw the harness coming down and my heart skipped a beat. It only took a few seconds but I was eager with anticipation. As soon as it made a sound like it had locked into place, the car began to move. The acceleration was a complete shock because it happened so quickly. Before I knew it I felt like I was flying and the car was humming louder and louder as it transported me through a long cylinder of white lights. After only a moment of travel the lights began to slow down, and I could feel the car coming to a stop. Fortunately the landing was much smoother than the take off. The car slowed to a stop and the doors opened right on cue.
I stepped out of the turbocar and into a room the size of an apartment building. I was on the uppermost of three floors, all of which surrounded a gigantic monitor at the center of the room's half circle shape. Most mysterious of all was the fact that I was surrounded by androids. Very busy androids. Not one of them actually looked like an android. If I didn't know better, I would have thought they were all Human.
All the androids were slender and they all wore the same black and white uniforms, but that was about all they had in common. They came in many different skin tones and hair colors, and different heights and weights. Some of them were made with machines protruding from their bodies, as if they were built to perform different functions.
Suddenly one of them yelled, "Captain on the bridge!" and all of them stood at attention simultaneously. I liked that!
"All right. Let's see what this baby can do. Where's the captain's chair?"
"Primary level, central position directly across from the monitor. If you step to the edge of this level, you can look down on your chair from here."
After thanking this android for his help, I looked over and noticed it was the butler! "Alfred... How'd you get here so fast?"
"I am another copy of the same model, in direct contact with the other two on the ship."
"There are three of you?"
"Yes sir," he said bowing before me with a smile. I remember being a bit mystified by this smile. His programming was more Human than any android I'd ever seen. He looked, sounded and acted so Human that I felt the need to constantly remind myself that he was built in a factory.
I saw a lift nearby and, though I was certain it would take me to the "primary" bridge level, I chose to descend the staircase that circled around to the second level, and the corresponding staircase that led to the lower level. The captain's chair was on a raised dais, flanked on either side by two smaller chairs for other personnel. There were androids at stations behind and in front of these five central chairs, but the chairs themselves remained empty.
I stepped up the dais and took my place in "the chair." It was very comfortable. All the controls were easy to read and worked by systems I already understood. Though I'd never flown a spacepod, I instantaneously understood what needed to be done to take control of it.
With a broad smile across my face, I made a ship wide announcement. "Attention, crew. This is your captain speaking." I stopped to relish that moment. I'd always wanted to say that. "I need to know what more is needed to leave the shipyard. All departments report." One by one, all the department heads chimed in.
"Propulsion here. All systems are go. Standing by for orders."
"Medical bay reporting on standby."
"Life support systems ready."
"Astrometrics ready, sir."
"Gravity and inertial dampening systems showing ready."
"Weapons and shields are go, sir. Standing by."
"Weapons and shields?" I asked, looking incredulously at the butler. "This ship is supposed to be the equivalent of a mobile home in space. Exactly what kind of weapons do we have here?"
"Port and starboard arrays of fifty caliber rifles, four along each side sir," came my answer over the personal intercom next to my chair, "as well as port and starboard cannons, one on each side, and a 12 gigawatt offensive laser system."
"Well," I said, trying to contain my shock. "Let's hope we never have to use them. Since all systems are ready, notify the sales office that we're ready to go, and release the docking clamps. Engage tertiary thrusters at 10% and adjust speed accordingly. Helm?"
"Captain?"
"Take us out. It'll be nice to see the stars again."
The entire ship buckled slightly as the docking clamps were removed, and the ship was essentially floating in space. I could hear in the background a young woman's voice saying, "Yes, sir. The captain says he's ready to go. The docking clamps have just been released. Permission to leave the shipyard." I couldn't hear the response, but it must have been positive because the helmsman turned the ship toward the exit doors.
Despite the immense size of my spacepod, coming out of the shipyard doors was still similar to watching a marble go through a basketball hoop. The light cast on us from within the shipyard shined on the back of our ship as we moved into the relative darkness of space.
"Captain," called a female android from behind me. "Would you like to use the monitor?"
"Brilliant. Yes. No magnification. I want it to remind me of an ordinary windshield."
"Yes, sir." Two seconds later I could see the enormous doors opening as we slowly moved into the darkness. The monitor, easily the height of three average men, had all sorts of information that I didn't fully understand displayed on the screen over the image of where we were going. The intercom became very chatty, with people sharing information across the ship. I listened closely for a moment.
"Docking clamps retracting."
"Tertiary thrusters holding at 10.3%"
"Approaching position 71."
"Clearing shipyard structure in 21 seconds. Holding steady."
I had no idea what they were talking about for the most part, but that was the beauty of this system. According to the salesman, I didn't have to. "The ship just about runs itself," he declared. From where I sat, those words rang true.
We cleared the shipyard without a hitch. The butler asked, "So... Where would you like to go first, captain?"
"Right now I just want to find a nice quiet place to rest so I can take a tour of my ship. Any recommendations?"
"Yes, sir. I would recommend taking up an orbit around Mars. With the light engines we can be there in about nine minutes. There are less than a thousand ships in orbit around Mars right now, and the colony there has no laws against simply sitting in orbit. You could take hours or even days to tour the ship, and no one would mind."
"To Mars, then! I've always wondered what it looked like up close. Helmsman?"
"Already plotting a course, captain."
"Who controls the monitor screen?"
"I do," answered the same female voice who offered the monitor in the first place. "The monitor is considered a part of the weapons and shielding systems."
"What is your name?" I asked, forgetting for a moment how that worked.
"You have yet to name me, sir. I am an Arianna android model 21X 3.7. I hope you won't be calling me Arianna. I hate that name."
I turned slowly to look at her. "You can... hate things?"
"My visage and personality are based on a real Human female from Earth's history named Arianna."
I looked at her and shook my head with a smile. "I thought the biggest drawback to having a ship this size to myself would be the loneliness, but I have yet to experience even that!"
"Your spacepod has many wonders, Master. Will you be exploring the ship yourself, or would you like a guided tour?"
"I'll take the guided tour as soon as we get to Mars if you can promise not to leave out too many details."
There were 20 "decks" on the ship, and each deck had varying numbers of "floors." Such terms were changing definitions in my mind as I learned more about the operations of the ship.
I asked for details, and that's precisely what Alfred gave me. After touring the ship for nearly four hours, I just had to stop. Alfred had no need to eat but I was famished, not to mention tired from all that walking. It turns out the turbocar was great for getting from one part of the ship to another, but horrible for touring. I ate, rested a bit, changed into a different pair of sneakers, and resumed the tour.






By midnight that night I was just too tired to continue. When the butler said "hours or even days to tour the ship," apparently he wasn't exaggerating. I told him it was

Explore my other stories

THE END