Youthful Love and Loss: A True Story of Boyhood Friendship and Forbidden Romance

Poster's notes

This is a story originally posted on Nifty by a friend of mine. On his behalf (because for some reason, he couldn't get an account here), I'm posting it here. He reckons people who read here might like it too.

While waiting for the next chapter of my friend's series "Webcam Boys" (which admittedly is taking a long while), I decided to post another of his stories here to make up for the long wait, though this is one of his earlier (if not the first) stories. What follows is a mostly true event* that happened to my friend when he was younger, and he wrote it from his recollections once he got older and better at writing. Only his name was changed for the sake of the story. Also for reference, the sport the story is referencing is badminton.

He highly appreciates feedback, criticism and encourages people to spot any typos or errors and if you wish to email him he's at:

horn1269@gmail.com

I hope you enjoy his story.




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The Photo

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“So what’s your name?” the coach asked the new boy.

“Christopher. But you can call me Topher.” the boy replied in a cheeky yet respectful manner.

I was present during this little introduction, and I saw the new boy for the first time. He was probably four feet and eight inches tall. He had a mop of dark brown hair that was naturally messy but in a way that looked good. He was fair-skinned like a dream come true. He wasn’t too lean or fat either, just the regular amount of boyfat a boy like him would have. His cheeks were smooth and soft-looking just as a child’s would be, and yet there was something more. He had an air of confidence that I never saw on any of our new recruits before. Really though, the first thing that came to my mind was ‘hell, he’s the cutest boy I’ve ever seen’.

That being said, I was practically ogling at Topher the whole time I was there. Suddenly, an idea sprung up within me, among other things.

“Hey coach, mind if I teach the new kid the ropes?” being one of the older and more experienced players, I was expected to do these things. No one said that this expectation denied ulterior motives.

“That’s a good idea, Martin. You guys can go over to court seven and do some drills. You can have a practice match later if you want.”

So that’s how Topher got to stand in front of me at court seven, with the face of an overeager kid wanting to learn and at the same time the swagger of a veteran who wanted to do better things.

“So new kid, what’s your name?” I already knew, but it seemed as good a conversation starter as any.

“Topher”

“Topher?” Now, I wouldn’t be truthful if I said I wasn’t serious about his name sounding too dorky to continuously say. Sure, his whole first name was Christopher, and that Topher was the logical nickname, but at that point, I just had to give him a personal nickname. Besides, I read somewhere once that name-calling belied a certain measure of authority, so I went with it. ”Sounds like a ‘gopher’. I might switch the two if I keep calling you that, and you might get pissed at me. Say, why don’t I call you ‘Tophy’?”

“But I like ‘Topher’…” he was faking a pout, and that made him all the more boyishly charming. It took a lot of my willpower just to keep a straight face.

“Don’t worry, if you really want it that way, then I’ll be the only one who calls you ‘Tophy’. Just between us.” I gave him a wink, and he seemed to lighten up at the thought of some secret codename that’s exclusive to just us. I could feel it then; he began to open up a little bit more.

“Alright Tophy, coach wants me to see how good you are, so we’ll have our very own court to play in before I move you up to the regular training.”

“Wait, why are you gonna be the one to train me? We’re practically the same age!” he complained with a hint of overconfidence. I guess he thought that being the same age meant that I was supposed to suck.

“That’s just the thing, Tophy. I’m—wait how old are you anyway?”

“I’m eleven. Why, aren’t you?

Okay, so puberty had yet to give me my manly appearance and I admit that I was still looking a bit too young for my age, not that I was complaining.

“Well, believe it or believe it, I’m already thirteen. So trust me to know more than you, kiddo.” I said with a laugh. His half open mouth shouted incredulity at how I’m older despite the small one inch difference in height.

“Anyway, let’s get started!”

I got him through the basic drills. Leg exercises, obstacle jogs, relays, that sort of thing. I was amazed at how good Tophy already was at these things. It was obvious he was already trained before he ever came here. Another thing that caught my notice was how his cute legs were boyish yet muscular enough to be agile, and how it showed a lot because of his sporty shorts being really, well, short.

“Damn, you were good out there! You’ve trained before, haven’t you?”

“Yeah. My family is staying around here for a while and this was the nearest court, but back home I was already in a team.”

“No wonder you’re a boy wonder.” I laughed. He knew I was teasing and laughed along, but not without an obligatory jab at my shoulder.

“Okay, you’re good at running, but let’s see you with a racquet. C’mon, one on one with me.” I smirked a bit arrogantly. To my surprise, he returned the smirk, with an even more amused one. It just occurred to me that he was also sizing me up.

So we got into playing. With every hit I made, he returned it with equal force. I used all of my tactics and ability to the point where I wasn’t even taking it easy on him. I made it serious. But I was seriously challenged. Tophy showed that he could counter all my moves and give good ones from his own side. I barely won our game with only a couple of points in my favour. I didn’t just break a sweat, I was sweating buckets. The same seemed true of him. We just looked at each other through the net and it seemed like the same thought hit us at the same time: we were equals. We both smiled. And just for me, this realization made me fall for him that much more.

They say that you can only truly know a guy when you trade blows with him. Well, in our game, we certainly did that. In that instant, we were friends.

From that day on, I was always with Tophy during trainings. Forget the whole student-teacher relationship, we were best buds. I always partnered off with him, and coach even saw it fit to always make sure I was with him since we got along so well. At break times, we’d be sitting on a bench talking about everything and nothing and joking and laughing like we’d known each other for years. When we play, he’s one of the few who can seriously keep up with my fast hits. My other friends there couldn’t help but notice how close we were. They said we were like rivals on those kids’ cartoons, except we weren’t actually fighting. Well, it did seem that way, but there was one thing they didn’t know. I was falling for Tophy faster than a maglev.
Pretty soon, the whole court knew me and Tophy as the ‘twins’ on account of him and me always being together and almost looking the same. Well, we both looked like kids anyway. Everybody also took to just calling him Tophy like me. He seemed to like it.

“Hey, you’re not bothered that everyone’s calling you Tophy now, are you? I mean, it was our thing…” I asked him one time after practice when we were alone in the changing room.

“No, not really. Just between us, I really changed a lot since I met you, Martin. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but when we first met, I was…a real jerk. I thought I was better than most guys here, even you. But ever since we became buds, I was cool with everything and everyone.” He said with a smile.

“Wow, pretty big words for an eleven year-old…” Tophy showed just how mature he was at this point. He was wise for his age. That was a plus point on my crush meter.

“So how exactly did I change you?”

“I’ve never had someone like you to play with back then. Most guys were worse or so much better than me, I felt like none of them could ever be close to me, y’know? When I met you, I met someone that’s just like me. I guess. Well, that’s how I think of it anyway. You’re the only person I really got close to.”

“We’re equals. So we get to understand each other that much better that anyone else. I think that’s what you’re trying to say.” At this point, so much more was being said through our eyes.

“Yeah, I guess that’s it.” He smiled like there were rainbows above him.

“So, Martin, you know how that’s connected to me being okay with everyone calling me Tophy?”

“Er, no. I was about to ask that…” well, I really was, but I was silent as I just ogled at him digesting his smartness and cuteness.

“I want everyone to know me as the changed person you helped me to be.”

“I don’t know what to say…” I really didn’t. He was overflowing with gratitude and meaning. I didn’t know how to handle it. I’ve never actually had a friend get this dramatic before. It was a new feeling. It made me…happy inside.

Suddenly, he hugged me. Tight. Since we were nearly the same height, he had no problem resting his head on my shoulder. I felt his warmth. I felt his breath. I even felt the beating of his heart. I hugged back as much as I can.

“Martin, thank you so very much.” He said quietly to my ear.

I was completely intoxicated by the moment and lost all inhibition.

“Tophy, I love you.” I quietly said back.

We both looked at each other. He had a sort of puzzled look on his face while I had a bit of worry on mine. I thought I might have gone too far. But he surprised me again with a smile.

“I guess I love you too, Martin” and he rested his head on my shoulder again.

Another surprise. Then, another quite more shocking one. I popped a boner, and it poked Tophy’s crotch. Tophy had his own, and it poked mine. All that bodily contact didn’t do well for our hormones.
We both looked at each other for a few awkward, silent moments. Then we both laughed.

“Hey Tophy, I’m getting real horny here. I hope you don’t mind if I jack off. I mean, you do it too right?” like I said, all inhibition lost. But I was still curious how I could be so confident about these things with him.
“I thought all guys did.” He said as we both laughed again.

“And you knew that how?”

“You’d be surprised about the things I know”

“It’s already got my attention…”


Giggling from my lame attempt at suggestive humor, we both nervously stripped to our undies until we were stark naked from the waist down. I was mentally thankful that most of the people in the court went home already, but to be sure I locked the door.

We didn’t need to hide the fact that we were both checking each other out. His boyhood was standing at a dignified three inches with his foreskin peeled back enough to expose the tip of his purple head. Obviously he was hairless and he had just that little amount of baby fat on his crotch. It was positively cute. Mine stood at a proud four inches with wisps of hair here and there. But aside from those, it looked a lot like Tophy’s except longer with my angry purple head peeking out.

We both started a slow rhythm as we masturbated together. It was not lost on me that I didn’t even invite him to join me yet he did, and that now he was jacking while looking at my dick, just like what I was doing. He wanted this as much as I did.

We picked up the pace. He started making a few grunting noises, while I, being more experienced at being silent, just made faces of pure ecstasy.

I grew ever bolder, and harder, as I looked at Tophy jacking off. This was the stuff dreams are made of, except that it was real. I was living the moment, so I took a chance.
“Hey Tophy, lemme do you.”

“Huh?” the concept of another hand jacking him off seemed foreign to him according to his face. Still, I reached out and put his jacking hand away from his dick and replaced it with my own. He was saying nothing, but he didn’t resist either, so I took it as a go signal. I started jacking him off, first slowly, then I went faster and faster.

“Ooooh….uhm…ahh..Martin, this feels tooooo good….” His grunting noises became moans as he closed his eyes savouring the pleasure.

“I want to make you feel good, Tophy, as thanks for being the best friend I ever had.” I said as I kept at it.
He was actually squirming now, the feeling becoming intense. I knelt down while jacking him off partly because I was getting tired of standing while jacking him and myself off, and partly because I wanted to try something else.

I stopped stroking him, and he opened his eyes and looked at me pleadingly. “Martin, please don’t stop…” he was practically begging.

“I won’t, I just wanted to know if it’s okay if I sucked your dick.”

“Wait, what? That sounds…gr—“

“Great, I promise.” Without further ado, I put his entire length in my mouth and started suckling like a baby would its mother’s breast.

Tophy’s dick was so warm and soft. It was hard yet tender at the same time. The taste was so new it was indescribable. Maybe it was actually salty, on account of it being sweaty, but I hardly noticed. It just felt good having it in my mouth.

“Aaaagh! Uuuuugh!” Tophy was practically screaming in pleasure now. I had to stop bobbing my head for a bit to tell him to quiet down. His moans became softer, but more…sensual. He was squirming so much that I had to keep both my hands on him to steady him because it looked like he was about to faint.
About another minute or two of sucking him, I stopped to give both ourselves time to breathe. Tophy was panting like crazy.

“So, did you like it?”

“That was the most awesome thing I ever felt in my whole life!” he said with the air of a child having ridden the world’s greatest rollercoaster.

“Well, I wasn’t finished.” I smiled as I made to engulf his little dick once more. But suddenly he pulled back and gestured for me to stop.

“Wait, I don’t want to feel good on my own. I want to do it to you too.”

“That’s really generous of you Tophy, but I’m okay.”

“It would be unfair if I left you hanging, or in this case, horny.” We both laughed hard at his joke.

I motioned for him to lie down on the floor. I positioned myself so that we were in a sixty-nine. He didn’t seem to know what we were doing but he got the idea pretty quickly. We started sucking on each other’s hard-on.

I’ve never gotten my dick sucked before. I’ve only ever dreamed about it, but I never really felt it. All I can say is, this much pleasure should be lethal. It felt so good. Too good. So indescribably pleasurable as he mimicked my tongue swirling and sucking. Whenever he would feel my exposed tip with his tongue, my whole body would spasm. We both moaned into each other’s dicks and the vibrations that it caused made us shudder in delight. It would be the most memorable climax of our young lives.

They say that you can only truly know a guy when you trade blows with him. Well, in our sucking, we certainly did that. In that instant, we were more than just friends.

The notion that we were gay passed my mind. But it really didn’t seem to matter to either of us anyway, so it wasn’t an issue.

The days went on and, if anything, we got that much closer to each other. We were really what you’d expect from two boys who’ve formed the greatest bond friendship could offer. And then some.

Our secret meetings in the changing room continued whenever they could. By then, one could say that me and Tophy were boyfriends. We just never thought to refer to it that way.

One fateful training day, I arrived expecting Tophy to greet me, like he always did. But this time, I didn’t see him, and instead it was coach that approached me.

“Martin, I haven’t thanked you enough for taking care of Tophy ever since he got here. You’ve positively been a good influence on him.”

“Oh, uh…you’re welcome, coach. Say, where is he anyway?”

“His mom called to say that their family is going back to California, since his parents’ work in our town is finished. “

I felt a large gaping hole in my stomach. I totally forgot about Tophy not permanently staying here. I never paid notice to when he said “My family is staying around here for a while…” and now it’s biting me in the ass…and in my heart.

“Oh, she also told me to tell you that Tophy's really thankful he met you.”

“Oh…thanks, coach….” My tone was deadpan and despondent, but coach didn’t notice and just went away to do coach stuff.

Tophy was gone. We didn’t even get to say goodbye. I knew he didn’t have a choice in the matter since, as an eleven year-old, he’s still dependent on his parents. I just blamed myself endlessly for not getting his number or any contact details while I could have. The worst part was, I never even asked him his last name. For the next few weeks, I had a noticeable drop in my performance because of my depression. My friends noticed it too, but coach just waived it off as something that would soon go away. My friends knew what my cause for depression was, and they sympathized with me until they helped me enough to recover a bit of my former happy self. But that wasn’t for another month. Even then, I never forgot Tophy.

After all those events, I realized to my great frustration that Tophy and I never got a picture taken of us together. The only physical manifestation of his memory was in a candid photo someone in the team took of him, where he looked at the camera just at the time it was taken as he was sucking on his finger. He looked really cute and innocent in that picture, just as I wanted him to look. That photo, along with many others, was posted on the court photo cork board where all the pictures of the team’s members were. After he left, I always took some time to look at his photo. It almost seemed like he was looking at me from inside that picture. I even pinned my picture next to his. Years passed, and I quit the team to focus on my studies. Even then, I still dropped by the court on occasion just to look at his picture. It still bothers me so much that I never got to have any means of contacting him at all. I knew I’d never see him again, and I had to live with that.

One day, I went to the court to look at his picture again, but something was different. Apparently, I’ve been gone so long that in my absence, the court changed ownership, and that my team left to settle on some other court on another city because of it. I haven’t been keeping in contact with them, so I never knew. The worst thing was, since our team left, our picture cork board was taken down, and all our photos were gone.
To this day I still berate myself about not acting on my impulse to just steal that photo from the board and keep it for myself.

Still, Tophy gave me much. I live my life now knowing that it’s happier because I got to meet someone like him.



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*only the blowjob at the dressing rooms was fictional.