A Black Mans Path to Love and Self-Discovery: A Journey of Passion and Identity

I pushed him away from Donna and me, as I walked away he grabbed me and shook me and said "I didn't spend my time and money making you ours to you to just give it away to some random slut". Donna kicked him in his nuts as I walked away and yelled at him "what the fuck is wrong with you, go and fix it before he leaves". Donna came down the steps first and said “I don't know what's gotten into him" as she took my hand and lead me towards the kitchen. She put ice in a towel to put on my face as I finished getting dressed. I told her “no thank you, I understand my position here, have a great life". Derek rushed down the stairs and blocked the door. Looking like he wanted to cry, starring at me, I said "thank you, for the unwanted memories and thank you for making me understand that I was just something you bought and sold". I took the key that belonged to my truck plus their house key off my key ring and left it on the counter. As I continued to say "have a great life". Donna turned and said "we didn't buy you J, I did that because you made my dreams come true. You helped us get pregnant and we have the best sex possible when your here" as she walked over and shoved the keys back into my pocket. Donna kissed me and said "come back when you feel ready and we can talk about it with a clear head, move Derek you fucking asshole". He told her "no, J, I'm sorry, I never meant to hurt you but seeing you with them pissed me off and I didn't understand why you were with them instead of us". I pushed him aside and walked back home.

Brian was up and dressed looking at TV. and as he seen my face he said "WHAT the fuck happened". He rushed over to me but I pushed him away and I just sat on the couch. Brian said "tell me what the fuck happened to your face" he walked over to my mini-refrigerator and put ice in a towel. He put a pillow on my lap and sat down as he put the ice on the left side of my face. He seen that I wouldn't look at him and he just laid his head on my shoulder as he kept the ice on my face. I looked at him and told him “you can leave if you want, you won't hurt my feelings". Brian said "fuck you, I'm not going nowhere" as he snuggled a little closer as he continued to say "was the person you went to go see yesterday and today the person who left a hand print on your face". I mumbled "yeah". He just looked at me and laughed as he reached under the pillow and grabbed my cock through my jeans. I took a deep breath and said "is that all I am to you, I realize that I'm the only black person around here but I'm more than just a fantasy; I'm a human being looking for someone to give me attention and love". He looked at me, kissed me then said "have you met you, you’re more than someone's fantasy, you are someone's future husband material. J your one of the smartest person's I know, you speak 3 different languages, you’re always helping someone, you’re always volunteering, you play all those instruments and your just a good person in general if anyone passes that up, their crazy and ooh plus you have an insane body and a dick that worth the pain". I was going to say something sarcastic but I wasn't even in the mood to argue. So I just looked at TV as Brian started to play 100 questions. My answer to all his questions was "mind your damn business".

Next thing I know I was waking up and it was day light. I looked at the clock on my wall and it was 8 o'clock in the morning. I looked around for Brian but he was nowhere to be found. I just laid there with my eyes closed until I felt Brian slapped me on my ass. I opened my eyes thinking why does everybody like hitting me. But he cooked breakfast and had it all fancy on a serving tray. He said "from what I remember you liked a bagel with the crème cheese, egg whites, bacon, a cup of Apple juice, and a cup of milk" as he gave me a morning kiss. I was impressed as he sat the tray down next to me and I asked "why are you naked, what if my parents come home". He replied "well I don't like clothes and your parents aren't coming back until Wednesday now, I kinda read you text message when your phone lite up. So we have this big ass house to ourselves until then." I just stared at him in amazement and said "you must want something" as I took my first bite of food. He sat down next me with his bowl of cereal and I said "first get up and let me see your stitches". He got up and stood in front of me facing the television, then grabbed his ankles without bending his knees. I immediately got hard and said "you didn't need those stitches" as I kissed his right cheek. He said "it doesn't even hurt anymore but I am doped up from the medication and stop trying to start something that you’re not gonna finish". I sat up and grabbed his hips to pull him closer and buried my face into his is ass while he said "they said twelve hours J, but that didn't mean stop". So I stopped and said "yeah you’re probably right, since it's only been since around 4 o'clock yesterday when you got you stitches and it looked like they fell out when you took your shower. Thanks for the meal; I think I will just continue eating". He turned to look at me to say "you son of bitch" as he sat down on the couch.

Brian said "well I wanted to get to know you better anyway, so I went through your stuff while you were asleep. Especially your phone, maybe if you stop sending dick pics to people you can find love, and love music was most of you music on your phone. And you favorite color must be blue because in all your pictures you have on blue, well damn you have on blue now. And where did you find that band called Boyce Avenue they rock a little something something even though most of their music is love songs" he said with a smirk. If my mouth could have hit the floor it would have went to the basement and he was still talking about what he found in my phone. I was impressed and speechless. I said "why are you telling me this". Brian look shocked as he looked at me and said "well I told you I wanted to get to know you, since you didn't help me I help myself". He got up and walked to my radio and connected my phone to it and started playing Boyce Avenue's acoustic version of their song FIND ME. I looked and said "WHAT do you know about the song". Brian said "I know that's your favorite song at the moment because it’s the most played song on your phone according to the playlist labeled most played". He sat on my lap facing me and gave me one of the most passionate kiss I have ever received as he grinded his body against mine. I pushed him away, because I didn't know what else to do. Brian said "to be so smart, you’re dumb". I grabbed him and kissed him back. He grabbed my shirt and lifted above my head, then started to unbuckle my jeans as he begin kissing me again. I grabbed him closer and said "you don't have to do this, we can do something more than have sex". Brian giggled and said "sure, like what" as he continued to kiss me. Since I couldn't think of anything I picked him up by his legs and putting my middle finger in his hole as I carried him to my bed letting my pants fall. He says "don't worry I already tested myself; shove it in as you want". I reached over to the night stand and grabbed a condom and lube. I squirted the lube all over his ass, as I put the condom on. Brian put his legs on my shoulder and took a deep breath as I spreaded his hairy cheeks apart and slowly pushing myself into him.

Brian slapped my chest and said "quit being a bitch, shove it in like you did last time". I kissed him and shoved my hard cock inside his slippery hole, Brian yelled "fuck yeah, do that shit". Rough as possible going in and out of him thinking he would tell me to stop or start crying but instead I heard moans of pleasure and Brian telling me that I was his as I kissed his chest and licked his nipples. After awhile I was getting tired so I asked him "how was his riding skills". Brian seemed nervous since he kind of did it the other day but he was still nervous, I did take his virginity about 24 hrs ago. But I turned on my back to flip him in top of me, as I gave him instructions on what to do. I told him "first don't look so nervous, put your feet flat on my bed and your hands on my thighs for balance then go up & down”. Brian still looking nervous but he did what I told him and I can tell when he got comfortable because as I said “come on Brian, stop acting like you never watched porn before” he started jacking himself off as he slammed down on my cock as hard as he wanted. I got turned on even more with every thrust as my moans began to match his. Then he stopped, so I opened my eyes, Brian was HARD and he looked at it like he never seen it before as I started to do short humps in and out of him. I laughed and said "that's what you call a dick getting hard Brian, it won't hurt you" as I sat up to suck it. Brian put his head back and moaned "just like that" as he bounced up and down on me as I allowed him to face fuck me with his hand on my head. After awhile he pushed my head back and started jerking himself off as fast as he could and shot one of the biggest load, as it shot in the air then landing on my abs. Brian fell backwards in pleasure as I pulled out of him to reposition myself and took off the condom. I gave him around 10 hard thrust inside him and squirted all my cum inside of him, as I trembled in ecstasy. I couldn't hold myself any longer so I allowed myself to fall on top of Brian.

Breathing hard I told him "you didn't need those pills; you needed my cock in the right position". Brian kissed me and still breathing hard he said "since I want to start this relationship off right without lies, I took your truck yesterday after you thought I was sleep to go get the pills Dr. Miller proscribed me to take and I kinda took the money to pay for them out of your wallet that was on the floor and your spare key". I pushed myself off of him to fall back in the opposite directions and said "you did what". He crawled to me and kissed the crease of my thigh between and my pubic area to say "babe I sorta thought you wouldn't mind, I'm sorry" as he started sucking my cock. I couldn't even think proper to give him a piece of my mind. So I just laid back and enjoyed it. A little while later I opened my eyes to see that he had a slightly mad look on his face; probably since I didn't cum yet, so he said "that was my sorry and I will never do it again". I said no words but gave him a look, like really, that's all you got. He smacked his lips and started back sucking as I gave him directions on how to please me. Brian did everything so fast, I couldn't help but cum so I didn't warn him that I was even close to cumming, until I grabbed his head and pushed my cock to the back of his throat so that he would have to swallow all my squirts of cum.

As I finished, I told him to come and lay next to me. Brian licked and kissed me from my pubic area to my neck, it was one of the best things he did. Then he said "I hope your yesterday wasn't ruined when the twins left, but I told them I really needed your help with something urgent" as I replied with giggle "so you have been lying to everyone since you been here, huh, is your name really Brian, are you really here". He looked down and laid his head on my chest. I thought to myself that I was going to have to find this kid a backbone quick. I jumped up on my knees and told Brian to hit me in my chest or grabbed my shoulders and shake me or slap me. Brian looked at me and said "no thank you". So I smacked him on his ass leaving my hand print on his hairy ass. He tensed in pain as I told him again "hit me you little bitch". Since he didn't I grabbed his legs, spreaded them open to pull his body against mine and slapped his chest. I screamed "hit me back". Brian just laughed and said "no thank you, I get what you’re trying to do but I'm happy being me, so no thank you, you little bitch". I leaned down and said "what do you want to do today then, you little bitch" as I stuck my middle finger in his hole. He gave me a confused look and said "haven't really gave it any thought (in between his sentence he said “oh fuck, stop I can’t think when you’re inside of me”, so I went faster as he moaned, then he stopped me and finished what he had to say) but since you asked I want to talk about the person who you went to visit and left that mark on your face". My facial expression changed and said "I don't think so" and went back to the couch to finish my breakfast. Brian said "sucks to be you because we're going to talk about it since it must be eating at you, now spill". He walked over and noticed that I had on underwear Brian said "it must be big since you have on underwear". I looked up and said "does everyone know I'm irritated when I have on underwear". He knocked my food out my hand and just looked at me.

We just starred at each other. Then he slapped me. I got up and shook him and yelled "what the fuck is wrong with you". Brian just looked at me as he cried; I let him go to clean up the food but Brian still trying to get information out of me and tried to pull my underwear down. I pushed him away but he kept trying but I kept pushing him away. Then he said "you are what's wrong with me, you want to save everyone but not yourself that's why that person slapped you". I turned to look at him "are you worth me telling anything to, are you worth my time and energy for you to move on and not think anything else about me, like the rest of them". He hugged me from behind but again I just pushed him away. Brian yelled "look I'm sorry, I really don't know what's happening. These past few days have been crazy, and I'm mad that you went to go see someone else after I told you how I felt. I felt like you just spit in my face and told me I was nobody, especially when you haven't told me how you feel. How do you feel, about all this?" I looked up at him and said "I don't have feelings; I just go with the flow until something good happens". And before I could finish what I wanted to say Brian cuts me off to say "well can I be that something good". So I just gave up all fight and told him everything that happened between Derek, Donna, and I. I told him every detail that I could remember as he just listened and starred. HALF AN HOUR later I was done and it looked like he was lost for words. I just waited for his response as I started drinking on my Apple juice. Even though it was only 2 minutes of silence it felt like 2 years. Then he finally said "so how do you move on from that so we can be together, in an open, honest relationship where we both can be happy". I looked away because who actually knows what to say in these situations, so I said "I don't know, the only thing we can do is take it one day at a time, to see where we land". For some reason Brian face lite up and he pulled on my dick. I pulled away and said "how about you get to know me more than just for my dick being inside you". After another awkward conversation, I walked over to my pool table humming the song Brian put on repeat earlier and said "that's play a game, whoever shoots a ball into a pocket no matter which ball or pocket the other person has to answer any questions the other person asks, deal.

We ended up playing pool for almost six hours, basically until we got hungry. We were in the kitchen and Brian said something that I wasn't expecting "can I fuck you on the counter top". I laughed and said "doubt that will happen". Brian came over and kissed my neck from behind and reached around to grab my cock and said "well it's not a question, I was telling you I'm gonna fuck you on the counter top, spread that ass open now". Brian grabbed my ass and forced my cheeks apart as he slid his semi-hard cock up and down my hole as he whispered in my ear of how he was going to take what he wanted, as his hand went from stroking my dick to around my neck. I stood there and said "your too weak to take what you want, you couldn't handle this even if your wanted to" I slightly pushed him away but he grabbed my waist and put the tip of his dick on my hole slowly pushing it in as I pushed back. He slapped my ass and told me stop moving as he started to ram his hard cock in and out of me as he pinned me against the counter by the refrigerator. I felt kind of nervous because I didn't want another episode of what happened yesterday but when he started pounded me even harder I forgot what I was thinking about. All I could think about was he learned quick as he felt so good going in and out of me as he wanted. Then he turned me around and lifted me onto the counter and plunged into me again as he placed my legs over his shoulders and licking on my nipples. I was stuck in the moment and moaned uncontrollably. Brian smiled and said "got my bitch right where I want him" as he started jacking me off. He turned me on so much I could've came right then and there but I pushed his hand away. He continued with his in and out stroke like it was the last time he was ever going to have it. My body vibrated as he took control and said "I'm coming right along with you". He did his last pumps inside of me and exploded. His face looked like he was in ecstasy as he bent down and fall on top of me. I looked at him and said "um I didn't get to cum". He looked at me and lifted up to point at my dick that oozed out a whole bunch of cum. I was shocked because I didn't even feel it. Brian said "that's how you know I'm just that damn good" as he pulled out of me and sled to the floor. I got up put my cock to his lips and slowly went in and out of his half opened mouth. I rested his head on the island wall and face fucked him until I came. But this time when I came he pressed my body onto his face as he enjoyed every drop of it that squirted in his mouth as I told him "I felt it that time".

After we cleaned up, cooked, ate, cleaned up again and was back in my room. I asked him "how long can you last without sex". He laughed and said "over twenty years, why". I said "how about we do a challenge of not having sex for the next 2 days, so we can get to know each more". He agreed but only if the loser has to do whatever the winner wants for the day, no matter have long or crazy. I agreed because I knew he wouldn't last long. We spent the rest of day naked but mainly talking about each other's past like friends, family and my exes (because his last relationship was when he was 12 and I didn’t count that as a real relationship), plus a lot about whether our relationship will work or not. When it was time to go to sleep, I faced Brian even though he had faced the other way. Brian being Brian, he placed his butt right on my cock and was sort of grinding up against me. I said "are you ready to give up". He replied a quick "no". I hugged him from behind. As I can remember he grinned his body up against mine until I fell asleep. When I woke up, it was a completely different story. I woke up with his mouth around cock and Brian looking shocked that I had woke up so soon. I smiled and said "continue, slave for the day". Brian stopped and said "a shower would do me just good right now" as he walked to the bathroom. I followed as he got into the shower and gave him a good morning peck on the lips. Brian said "you don't know how hard it is for me, I have to make up for lost time, I only lost my v card a few days ago". I just smiled and said "its ok slave, I will make all your dreams come true". He laughed and said "hope so". So I smacked his ass and said "hurry daddy needs breakfast". Brian sort of said something under his breath as he finished his shower. But as we showered I asked something that was on my mind that he said last night. I said "Brian did you really mean that you wanted to have sex with one more person before you could commit to a relationship". He looked shocked like I wasn't suppose to ask that question. He responded "no, but I would like to someday, all I want is you right now". I said "you don't have to lie, tell me how you really feel, I won't get mad". He step toward me and said "to be honest, I don't know what I want so whatever you choose is fine". Brian left the shower to dry off and cook, so I stayed in to think alone. Once I got out the shower and finished my morning routine I headed downstairs all I could do was stare at him as he cooked. Then finally, I said "I need a huge favor and before you say anything let me talk. I want to have closure with Derek and Donna, and I need you to come with me and if you want, we can stay and have sex with them. But only if you want to or we can leave right after". He didn't say anything for awhile but he came over to me and as I looked the other way he said "I'll go but you have to fuck him as hard as possible then we get back here you have to make love to me, okay". I was shocked and just gave him the best kiss I could possibly give someone.

Around 4:30pm I text Donna and asked can we talk. And everything was set for me to arrive around 6 o'clock. I was nervous for some reason so I kept trying to talk Brian out of it, but it was no luck because he told me if he can come clean about his lies and face me about how he felt, this should be a piece of cake, for a person like me. Then after awhile he said "do you wanna get slapped again" just to shut me up.

But 5:45 rolled around, Brian and I walked around the corner to Donna and Derek's house. I let myself in as usual with my key and they were there waiting on me as usual but this time with clothes on, plus they both looked shocked that I brought Brian. They had dinner waiting on us but it was an uncomfortable silence as we ate waiting on their help to leave. Donna finally broke the silence and said "I'm glad you wanted to talk, even though no one has really said anything". Brian giggled and said "I think she was referring to one of you two to actually say something". But neither one of us actually said anything, until the door shut behind Eric as he left. Derek looked at me and said "glad you came, I'm sorry that a slapped you, that never should have happened and if you give me the chance I can show you how good of a person that I can really be". To me it didn't seem like he meant it so I replied "did Donna make you say that, because it doesn't sound like you, it sounds like Donna."

So Derek got up and grabbed my shoulders and looked me in the eye to say "I was jealous when I seen you with him and those 2 girls, you’re the first person we allowed in our sex life and it's what I always dreamed of. And I thought if you were too busy with them you wouldn't have time for us. So I'm sorry I did anything to upset you and make you feel like you were bought and sold. Just come back and we can make it work." He tried to kiss me but I moved my face to say "only on one condition". I moved closer and whispered something in his ear so Brian couldn't hear me. Then I said "apology accepted, no one should bring it up again, RIGHT". Donna looked relieved as she pulled her loose fitting dress over her head to undress and nodding at Brian to do the same.

About time all of us got upstairs we were all naked, leaving a trial of clothes from the dining room. Once we made sure that Donna could get a good view of the action, I grabbed the handcuffs from their side table and I went to the foot of the bed where Derek and Brian were making out. I cuffed both of Derek hands instead of Brian to the post of the bed that was just across from Donna. Derek was shocked because the plan was for me to handcuff Brian but I changed my mind when Donna whispered to me to fuck him silly as we walked up the stairs.